O amandina si o Cola

January 15, 2017 § Leave a comment

Scriam acum cateva zile ca o amandina la momentul potrivit este nepretuita. Dar pentru mine, prajiturile astea ultra-zaharoase si hiper-delicioase au o insemnatate aparte… De fapt, eu asociez multe dulciuri cu diverse perioade sau episoade din viata mea. De exemplu, visinele in ciocolata sau bomboanele fondante veneau sa indulceasca zilele cand aveam pregatire la matematica cu un diavol de femeie. Prajitura ‘Puisor’, adica choux a la crème era facuta mai ales la Pasti si o adoram pur si simplu. Iar semilunele cu nuca ieseau din cuptor sambata seara fix inainte de serialul Beverly Hills.

Dar incepusem sa povestesc despre amandine. Se facea ca eram in anul I de facultate. Cine a inventat expresia ‘over the moon in love’ stia ce spune. Dragostea aceea infrigurata, care te face sa iti pierzi capul, sa nu simti trecerea timpului si nici apasarea grijilor, sa nu stii de foame ori de sete. Parcurgeam distanta dintre Titan, unde locuiam si Unirii verificandu-mi in geamurile metroului starea fustei si aranjandu-mi cate o suvita de par. Frematam de nerabdare si imi recapitulam in gand ce sa spun, ce sa nu spun… La Unirii ma astepta el, invariabil sprijinit de o coloana, imbracat in blugi albastri si tricou. Whoaaaaaaa….. 🙂 Bineinteles ca toate zidurile de aparare cadeau atunci. 🙂

Ieseam apoi la Unirii si traversam direct catre cofetaria Tip Top, unde urmau invariabil o amandina si o sticla de Cola. Desigur, pentru mine prajiturile din vitrina nu insemnau nimic, as fi mancat si carton si tot fericita as fi fost. Si ne tineam de mana non-stop. Dupa prajitura, odiseea continua cu o plimbare enorma: de la Unirii, via Izvor, Eroilor, Grozavesti si pana in Crangasi, mergeam imbratisati, lipiti ca marca de scrisoare si ni se parea ca nu exista fericire mai mare ca a noastra. Si chiar nu exista. Comentam tot, povesteam tot, dar si tacerea era atat de dulce si timpul avea infinita rabdare… 🙂 Cred ca niciodata nu m-am mai plimbat atat de mult si cu siguranta niciodata nu am simtit o fericire mai cuprinzatoare ca in acei ani.

Uneori ma intreb de ce ‘simt acut si vad monstruos’, vorba lui Caragiale, si mi-as dori sa fiu mai cerebrala si mai ponderata. Dar unde sa fi incaput in inima mea atata fericire ca in anii aceia si cum altfel as fi putut pastra amintirea celor mai fericite amandine din viata mea?

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Mamaliga cu branza sau Chestii simple, care te fac fericit

November 26, 2015 § Leave a comment

De exemplu, atunci cand intri pe usa dupa o zi lunga la serviciu, el tocmai pune pe farfurie o mamaliga aburinda. Si apoi in cateva minute va povestiti unul altuia intamplarile zilei printre imbucaturi de mamaliga cu branza si ceva smantana. Apoi el o sa spele vasele in timp ce tu intinzi rufele pe care tot el le-a pus la spalat. Distributia muncii in familie: chestie de baza si totusi complicata.

Sunt foarte recunoscatoare atunci cand pe masa ma asteapta o mancare simpla si calda. Cand cineva (el) imi face viata mai simpla si mai frumoasa. De exemplu, imi cumpara flori asa, fara motiv, si dimineata pune apa la fiert pentru cafea (insert big smile here).

Observati repetarea cuvantului ‘simplu’ aici? De multe ori o femeie nu are nevoie de cine stie ce favor sau dovada de iubire (desi uneori merge si asa ceva, de ce sa mint :)…) ci pur si simplu de o mana de ajutor care sa ii usureze viata si sa i-o coloreze.

Watching the Perseides and chasing stars

August 13, 2015 § Leave a comment

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We are all made of stardust. (C.Sagan)

Last night I fulfilled one of my longest-standing dreams: star-gazing in the mountains. While I can’t give an accurate rendition of the experience, I can say it was truly breath-taking.

When Elvin told me we could go watch the Perseides because we would have full visibility that night I was immediately in. As we drove to Col de la Faucille we could see groups of people perched on the sides of the street that was winding the mountain, installed in their chairs and covered with blankets, watching the sky in silence and completely oblivious to everything else. I could tell we were in for something magical.

Luckily Elvin had a blanket in the car and so we found a more secluded place in the woods, barely lit. And then we hunted the falling stars. Every time we saw one my heart skipped and I let out a loud shriek which sort of freaked Elvin out. 🙂 But my heart was beating so fast with the beauty of it all. The sky was clear and star-studded. Sometimes when a star fell you could still see the dust track it left. I made so many wishes as we lay on the grass, like kids … well, kids who drink beer that is. 🙂

We lay there for about an hour, allowing our thoughts to flow in the darkness and smiling ear to ear whenever a big meteorite dropped from the crown of the sky. It was nothing short of miraculous, and a night I will most definitely keep in my heart forever.

I also think this is a great experience for couples. The whole thing has something mystical to it as you reflect how little you are compared to the Universe; this definitely helps put things into perspective. There’s also something playful and quite intimate about two people who share such an experience. There is nothing to do but be and enjoy this experience together.

Thank you Elvin for a most amazing night. 🙂

 

 

She cried, he snored. Lessons in love (1)

July 29, 2015 § Leave a comment

I have been in a relationship for quite some time – 11 years, to be precise (but who’s counting?). I’m not saying this to convey the fact that my long-standing relationship is in any way authorizing me to give marriage advice. Having grown up together we still fight (now more than ever, it seems), still want to bite each other’s head off… and still love each other (or so it seems).

I am writing this only as a means of crystallizing my experience. And if it helps anyone else, in any way, that makes me happy.

Episode 1. License to love = license to kill?

It seems that when you are involved with someone you tend to get on top of each other, and I don’t mean this is an erotic way. I mean that being in a relationship seems to makes us think that violence and abuse are allowed. How do we define violence and abuse? It can mean anything from beating your husband with a stick, to calling her names, to emotional blackmail to repeatedly neglecting your partner’s needs and wants.

There are 2 things that make violence and abuse ‘the template’:

1. Growing up with this pattern. When violence and abuse are our reality as children and teenagers, it becomes increasingly difficult to detach ourselves from these schemas; we tend to replicate them in our adult lives because they are a big part of us, they are the known part in the unknown.

2. Roles that fit us. Couples where there are big issues but who survive are able to do so because they have found roles that fit them. One is the pursuer, the other the distancer. Of course the dance between the pursuer and the distancer is a very painful one (because the two don’t often really meet) but it quickly becomes the daily reality. Lack of self-awareness and situational awareness only aggravate this painful scenario. U2 put it beautifully ‘You got stuck in a moment and you can’t get out of it’. Except you don’t even know you’re stuck…

– to be continued-

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