The runner that I am

November 25, 2015 § Leave a comment

Two nights ago I was feeling a little ‘bleah’ about going for a run. It was like I was missing inspiration, so while Elvin was working on our wedding ‘Save the date’ invite (I know, great man!) I put some music on – it always gets me going. I spent some time warming up and visualized myself running pain-free and enjoying the feeling. It was about half past eight when I laced up my shoes and went out the door.

The first 3 minutes were not easy; they never are as my body seems to be having an amazing time trying to beat inertia. But I paced myself and moved on… and on… Soon I came to the point I had reached the last time I went running with Elvin and decided more was in for me. I made a turn, passed the church and kept running. I couldn’t believe how amazing I was feeling! Sure, there was that nagging pain in my calves but I breathed into it and let it go. There were a few moments I was dreading – such as hills. But I took it easy on the hills and did.not.stop. Soon I made a turn towards Terrain Jakobi and passed through a pitch-black patch. This wasn’t very cool, as it’s by a construction area and I was fearing someone could… you know, harm me. I remained vigilant and kept running. I think I could watch myself from afar, watch how my body kept moving at a steady pace harbouring fear and dread.

Soon there was light again. I was thankful and imagined how I could be running this route in the winter mornings. I visualized myself running on a chilly winter morning when the world is still asleep and loved the thought! I checked in with my body, it was going strong – my God, what a feeling! I remembered how last Saturday I went for a run through rain which turned into sleet which soon turned into snow. That run made me so much stronger! The fact that I didn’t abandon the run when every ounce in my being said ‘go home and have a hot cocoa, no one should be running in this weather’ built up my resilience in ways I’m still discovering.

Our bodies are so much stronger than we think! Our minds are so much more resilient than we imagine! We only need to keep at it, keep pushing, be persistent. Have patience and the result will come. Keep being inspired and you will make strides. I feel that after some time now I am finally making strides again in my life. I’m doing something good for myself.

That night the neighborhood was almost empty and all was chilly and dark. My body felt light as a feather and my heart was awash with joy. Something in my brain was sparkling; perhaps some neural pathways that were just forming? I felt like I could keep running much longer but didn’t. I’m containing my energy for an amazing adventure that will unfold soon enough.

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