Thoughts from a bride-to-be

November 19, 2015 § 3 Comments

We’re getting married next year. Naturally, I’ll be wearing a dress. 🙂 I’ll be honest: yes, I want my dress to be beautiful and I want to look stunning. However, I just don’t get the whole hysteria around wedding dresses (and weddings in general). I’ve started doing a bit of research to get some inspiration and see what others have done for their weddings and let me tell you: I get SO exhausted by all the décor, the millions of details, the show. Is a wedding a show? Or perhaps a show – off? I don’t have anything against telling a story through your wedding (this is what we also plan to do), but when artificial details overpower the bride and the groom, when it feels like the wedding venue is a museum (so much to see, and do and touch and experiment with!)…

Brides start looking for their dress at least one year ahead. Anything less than that is considered late and coutouriers look at you with sheer horror when you show up at their salon a few months before The Big Day. Everything about the dress, the make-up, the hairstyle choices is hysterical. So much preparation, so much effort, so much money going into… what? A wedding is a few hours of having fun, of being together with friends and family, of celebrating your love. And I simply don’t see the love and the raw emotion between the million décor items and the show itself.

Instead I’m opting for simplicity. Yes, there should be an element of surprise and unexpected, some sort of anticipation and butterflies in the stomach. But they all come when you create space for them, when you allow for intimacy and some sort of spontaneity…

More on this to follow. 🙂

P.S. What if I tell you that so far, between hundreds of wedding dresses I saw on the Internet none stole my heart? I do have an idea for how my ideal dress would look like (spoiler alert: nothing completely out of this world) but unfortunately none of the couturiers I followed make that kind of dress! Can you believe it…? Because I can’t!

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§ 3 Responses to Thoughts from a bride-to-be

  • Daniela E. says:

    We got married in 2014 and the experience of planning a wedding that was going to take place in Romania from Germany was, let’s say….interesting. Like any other bride to be, I looked around at what other people did, asked my friends who were incredibly anxious to offer any type of advice they thought would help me and, although I’m sure they didn’t want that, I felt overwhelmed and unimpressed at the same time. The thing that helped me get through this phase was to focus on one particular item and oddly enough, that wasn’t my dress. It was my bouquet. For me, flowers hold a special place in my heart, they bring me joy and relaxation, so I pictured in my head my perfect bouquet….after that everything came naturally, it flowed…everything was harmonious to that bouquet in my head…the colours, the way the Restaurant needed to look, the way my hair needed to look. So my advice is to focus on something that brings real joy to your heart, something you definitely want to have on your special day, maybe a piece of jewelry, maybe a type of veil, and the rest will follow organically. At least, that’s how it worked for me! And remember to enjoy the whole process and to cherish your choices, it’s an incredible and privileged experience to get to plan your wedding! Hope i didn’t bore you :*

  • Sinziana says:

    Exactly, you hit the nail on the head Daniela!! The experience of organizing a wedding in Romania from a distance is interesting in more than one way. 🙂 We couldn’t deal with it so we decided to get married in France, close to where we live now. Ohh how wonderful your bouquet must have been! What flowers did you include?
    I do have some ideas about what kind of bouquet I would like, how I want my hair and dress, but have no clue about the ‘color coding’ of the wedding. I’ve never cared much about… napkins at a wedding. 😀
    For me, it’s essential to have 3 things: a good venue (and we have it, it will be by a lake in the middle of the forest), good music and good food (but not too much food). And then to r-e-l-a-x and enjoy.
    You’re right, we are priviledged to be able to organize our own weddings, make our own decisions and create something based on our own taste.

    Thank you for your wonderful advice, it’s so helpful! What would you say was the biggest lesson learned from your wedding?
    And also, how is the baby-to-be doing? :*

  • Daniela E. says:

    Oh my, your wedding already sounds sooo dreamy, I’m sure it will turn out great! If the venue and music are solved the rest will follow easily, you needn’t worry! What I learned was to be generous with my joy and to share it. Our wedding, although ours, meant so much for so many people…parents, sisters, brothers,friends…I loved being surrounded by so many people that wanted to help me, to share the burden and the joy of this wedding. My conclusion was to always be wary of extremes, of hunting down a simplicity that strips away the warm feeling that comes from involving everybody that cares about you. It also helped me fulfill this sort of basic matriarchal role that I never have before, where i was like a conductor to an orchestra, everyone following my tune. Hey, I’m getting quite melancholic here, must be the hormones 😛
    Baby is doing great! Last time we were at the doctor’s, he/she was sleeping sooo peacefully! Can’t wait for the next appointment!

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